justthissideofsane:

and it just really bugs me, more than I know how to explain.

For example, I was in the car with my mother this morning, going to pick up my younger sister (she’s 7); I noticed that, when she came out of the building, she was paired with one of her friends, and began thinking about how I know all of her friends personally because they’re often over after school, sleeping over, etc. And in a manner that I didn’t particularly think about, I said, “I always think it’s funny when I see kids with their friends- not that it bothers me that they have friends. Just because I never really did that, which was fine. I mean, I just never really wanted friends that way.”

And my mom said, in all her ableist glory, “Stop saying that. Even if it’s true, it’s disturbing.”

Disturbing? Fucking disturbing? There is nothing disturbing about thinking and feeling differently from someone else, and this applies to autistic/allistic people, queer/nonqueer folks, etc. There is nothing disturbing about the fact that what makes me happy is not what makes you happy. I am not hurting anyone against their will. I am not causing any negative energy. There is nothing disturbing about how I choose to socialize.

I’m 17 years old and still have friendships most people would consider a little bit childish. I’ve still never hung out with friends on the weekend. The last time I brought a friend over to my house it was for about two hours and I was 12- it went fine, but I have no particular desire to do it again. I want to see my friends (whom I love dearly and completely) when I want to see them and no other times, which usually means a couple of hours. I’m a very, VERY hypersexual person (that’s just me, and has nothing to do with being autistic) and I’m attracted to people left and right, but very few people catch my eye romantically because there just aren’t many people I want to spend that much time with, and that’s not because I think most people suck; I just don’t have romantic feelings for people very often (which is how you can be certain that the girl I’m seeing right now is absolutely fantastically amazing).

I don’t want to bring people home. I don’t want to call people on the phone all the time. I don’t want to see people on the weekends. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. There is nothing inherently “better” about being neurotypical, and nothing inherently “worse” about being neurodivergent. My autism does not make me a fucking soulless, terrible person and I hate it when people imply that it does.

Gah. It’s disturbing that people think they can so easily make assumptions about other people and our wishes/desires/thoughts/abilities merely because they know we’re autistic. 

(Source: saneoldsameold, via saneoldsameold)